Starting Over

Parenthood caught up with me. Nolan is now over 2 1/2 and we have another little one on the way. Life has been great but not without its share of struggles. I plan in posting some highlight pictures of the las two years soon.  But for now, here is our current family. 

The Final Countdown!!!

So, now I have that song by Europe in my head.  But, it truly is getting close to the day where the number of people in this family grows by 50% and the love in our hearts grows infinitely. 

We just about have the nursery completely finished and ready for Lil' Nolie (that's his rapper name).  We liked a jungle theme and I figure he'll look pretty similar to a monkey as a little guy and will probably resemble a giraffe as he gets older like his papa. 

So, Kara is the most beautiful pregnant woman that has ever walked the earth, maybe I'm biased, but I am truly in awe of what she is doing.  It has been a pleasure to help her through this and I'm thankful every day for her strength.  Here's a picture of her at 34 weeks (about 10 days ago).

But, we've decided that Nolan is going to be grounded for quite a while once he gets out...he's gotten in trouble for the following: improper use of toes, inappropriate somersaults, failure to follow directions, and inducing heartburn, back pain, and miscellaneous ailments. 

We've been so fortunate through this experience to have dozens of people give us gifts to get Nolan's life started and we thank all of you for your extraordinary generosity.  We've also received a lot of advice and I'm sure at some point we'll try all of it, because as much as we think we know already, we will come to a point where we have no clue how to help him.  But, I'm counting on instinct taking over....after all, people have been giving birth and raising little people for countless years, we aren't pioneers in parenting by any means.

I heard from one of my college friends, John, last night and I congratulate him on the birth of their first baby, Charles.  He filled me in on a few of the adventures they've experienced such as sleep deficiency and projectile poop.  But, the one thing that stuck with me was him telling me that just minutes after his son was born, while screaming (as most newborns do), John went over to him, started talking to him, and instantly his son stopped crying.  The son recognized his father.  On top of it all, this was Father's Day.  I'm so happy for John and Sarah. 

For me I truly hope that my little boy will feel peace and calm when he hears his father's voice.  And, I know he will find comfort and serenity in his mother's arms. 

So, I'm dreaming of that day and enjoying the last few days as a non-parent, checking things off of our to-do and to-purchase list.  I plan on writing again before he is born, but if I don't I'll be sure to post soon after.

Any man can be a father.  It takes someone special to be a dad.  ~Author Unknown

Sweet Nolie James

Dear Nolan,

62 days until you're due to meet us.  I don't think anyone will be able to tear you out of my arms.  I can't wait to look into your eyes the first time and know that I'm holding my son.  It will be amazing.

So, I want to let you in on a secret...your mom and I have NO clue what we are doing as parents.  Now, I won't let you read this until you're much older and have alread figured it out for yourself.  But, please be patient with us...we'll be trying our best.  I know you won't be comfortable all of the time and it will take us time to feel each other out, however, you will always be our first born and we will love all of your brothers or sisters, but you are, for better or worse, our guinea pig child.  So, that being said, I apologize for the mistakes I'm sure we will make...I hope you can forgive us. ;-)

 Every time I see your mom, I rub her belly and say hi to you...and believe it or not, you say hi back with a kick or a hiccup.  I love feeling you move, I just wish I knew if it was your elbow, knee, head, or butt that I'm pushing on.  Mom and I have told you a lot of great stories about our day...I'm sure you don't have a clue what we're talking about, but I like to pretend that you do and secretly have an opinion that your writing in your womb journal.  


So, I've been listening to some James Taylor lately (I'll introduce you to some great music someday) and I felt like Sweet Baby James needed a little rewrite.  I'm looking forward to singing this to you when you lay down to sleep.

"So goodnight, the moonlight's wating,
rock-a-bye, Sweet Nolie James.
Your heart beats so true and you know we love you.
It's time to go back to your dreams,
and rock-a-bye Sweet Nolie James."

(I don't think I have much future as a songwriter...but anyway)

Your mom and I think of you in everything we do. 
You are precious, you are our miracle, and you are loved.

Take care and you'll be hearing my voice echo through your mama's belly soon.

Love,
Dad

--Your faith will show through your actions, not your words.  It's actions that make a difference in the lives of those around you.

A Marathon Within a Marathon

There's something to be said for accountability.  In 2007, I had signed up for the Chicago Marathon and planned to run it on my own.  Needless to say, life got in the way and I didn't train properly, so I didn't go.  For the past 10 years I have wanted to run a marathon.  I've always viewed it as an experience of facing extreme physical demands and pressing on any way...despite your mind's better judgment urging otherwise.  So, when my friend Thom suggested we run one in Louisville, I took the bait and ended up registered for this stupid...I mean...incredible race.

On April 30th...3 days after I turned 30....this old man "ran" 26.2 miles...yes all in one day.  I also achieved my goal...no, not a time, but my goal of not riding home with a hospital bracelet on my wrist.  But, back to the accountability...I couldn't have done this without the peer presssure...er...encouragement from my wife and from Thom.  It was an awesome experience. I truly know my limits and for the first 19 miles or so, it really was a good time.  The last 7.2, though, were extraordinarily painful. My knees, hips, and ankles became molten lead.  I had, during the darkest part of my journey, told Thom to go ahead because I felt like I was holding him back...he shortly thereafter hit his own personal wall and we ended up finishing together.

But along the way, I experienced emotions I never had during any athletic event.  I have felt despair, I have endured fatigue, I have held my head up with pride, and I have expressed anger throughout an event, but at Mile 23, all of these fought a battle within me.  Nothing would  have felt more satisfying than laying on the curb and having someone take me in...but even in that low point, the importance of persistence and endurance prevailed, and all it took was a text message.

Of course, who texts during a marathon?  Answer....a tortoise does.  I had my phone on my arm for musical purposes, but to keep Kara (who was convinced she was becoming a widow) informed of our progress.  At Mile 23, which should really be called Misery Mile, I texted her to let her know I was walking the rest.  I broke down emotionally...I have let myself down.

My phone vibrates...the text reads, "Nolie and I are so proud of you.  Find it in you to finish, you will be fine."  In hindsight, I'm sure she was sick of standing there 7 months pregnant in the heat, so she would have said anything to make me run faster.  But, those words, helped me tap into a place a didn't know I had.  I said my share of prayers during that time and with all of this, I leaned forward, and my feet followed.

Up to this moment, I had always run for me.  Now I was running for my wife and my son.  Those words made me feel like a dad for the first time, and I'll never forget that moment...I didn't want to let either of them down...and I drew strength from that.

So, here we are just before crossing the finish line and then posing with Kara after inhaling some carbohydrates.

I've never been so hungry in my life.  So, if you are interested in running a marathon and are looking for someone to run with, be sure to NOT call me...I will only talk you out of it and there is a 0% chance I will ever  run a full marathon again.  I will stick to minis from this point on.

A Name for Our Boy
So...if you haven't picked up on it yet, we've decided to name our little guy Nolan James.  We both love the name and Kara had the idea of his middle name being after me, and of course I'm not going to say no to an awesome name like that.

30
So, now I am north of 30.  April 27, 1981, 8:41 P.M.,  I was born in Owensboro, KY (So, I'm not a Hoosier by birth). It's hard to believe considering graduation from college seems like last week.  But, I'm not having a mid-life crisis yet. 

I had a great birthday, though.  We had family and friends over for a little party the day after the marathon and I had a great time.  My parents came up....I'm so lucky to have great parents who are the reason I'm here in the first place and I'm glad that they will be enjoying their first experience as grandparents.

So, I hope Nolan doesn't think his daddy is too old since I'll be 30 when he's born.  I don't think he'll care much, but I hope he'll have memories of me before my hair turns gray...which I'm sure will accelerate after he is born.

Update
Last thing...we went to the doctor yesterday and found out our boy is right on schedule.  We go every 2 weeks now, so we're getting close to game time here.  We now have a dresser and a crib in the nursery.

We also found an adorable hat for him to wear during basketball season this winter.

Finally, after experiencing difficult Mother's Days for the past few years, Kara finally got to celebrate as a mom-to-be...so, some guy got her roses.

**Go through your day asking, "How can I make someone else's day a little bit better?"  Look for opportunities, they are everywhere.

Easter Week

Dear Son,
You're doing so well and we are so proud of you even though we've never met you.  You get larger and kick harder every day.  You are now kicking harder when you hear your daddy's voice.  You move around more every time your momma gives you food.  It's like you're beginning to run out of room in there.

There's a cool song on the radio right now that you'll hear some day called "If He's Anything Like Me".  It talks about a dad having a son and how there will be times the son loves him and hates him along the way.  I'm sure I'm going to make you mad, buddy, but know that it's all out of love. 

I'm so excited for the day we meet you.  I find my eyes welling up from time to time as I think about what it will be like when you're born.

We put together your crib yesterday and I'm sure you heard your mom complain about how I was doing it awkwardly. Don't tell her I told you this, but she usually has good ideas.  I'll post a picture this week of your crib and you and your mom.

I know you may not understand what Easter is about, but I do know you come from God.  I just want you to know that during this Easter week I think I'm going to feel connected to God more than ever.  He gave up His son for all of us, and the thought of giving you up right now is unbearable.  This shows me that God truly loves us, so much so that He gave up what He loved the most for us...all so we would love Him back and love each other.  Amazing...

You are my son...I love you.

Dad

Turkey Timer

The subject of this post is kind of what Kara's belly is beginning to look like.  She gets more beautiful everyday, and it is so awesome to see how this miracle happens day by day.  I can feel the little guy kick in there and he does somersaults daily.  I'm sure every parent thinks their kid is going to be a soccer player or a gymnast because of all of the movement, but I'm pretty convinced he's a little Adam Vinatieri in there.

We find ourselves wondering what he's going to look like, act like, say, and do.  He's basically a blank canvas right now and there is so much hope for his future and the great things he will do.  But, there are also fears when you hear about kids that go down the wrong path.  I pray that we can raise him to do the right thing and look to help others that need it.  I was reading Tuesdays With Morrie for about the fifth time and Morrie Schwarz, the dying professor in the book  had a great quote that I hope our little boy can follow:


"Devote yourself to loving others, devote yourself to your community around you, and devote yourself to creating something that gives you purpose and meaning." 

While this wasn't in a faith-centered book, I really think that's what our faith and being like Christ is about.  I want to have this attitude myself and I want to pass that on to our son as he grows older. 


So, as our little "turkey" continues to progress in the "oven", I am enjoying every moment of this pregnancy (I'm sure Kara would say there are moments that wouldn't be described as "enjoyable").  Here's what she looks like as of today...24 weeks along!!!

Our son...

Baby McFall,
We found out today that you are a healthy developing baby boy.  We are so proud of you and how much you've grown.  I have had dozens of visions today of who you might be someday.  Whatever paths you choose, know that you will be loved.  The family and friends that have all asked about you today is overwhelming.  Before you've even taken your first breath on your own, you have countless people thinking about you and praying for you.

You will be successful at whatever you do and we will love you unconditionally.  Every dad wants to have at least one son, and I've been blessed with you.  Your mom loves how active you are and that you kick her every night at 2 in the morning...we'll work on that schedule once you're born.

You're going to be the oldest child...that is a lot of responsibility...you have that in common with your mom.  You'll have to fight off jerk guys from your little sisters or defend your little brother if someone picks on him.  You'll be a role model to your siblings and they will want to be just like you.

This is what you looked like today...

and this...

You entertained us for about an hour during the ultrasound.  At first you were curled up and hiding so the tech had to coax you out.  Finally we got to see you and hear your 144 bpm heartbeat.  I think you got a little tired by the end because we saw an enormous yawn...sorry if we bored you.  And, right before we finished, you rubbed your eyes like a tired little boy after a long day and we said goodbye until we see you in person.

You're ahead of the curve in weight and you're ahead of the curve in love.  Keep growing little man of ours....we can't wait to meet you.  God has big plans for you and we are so blessed to have you.

Love,
Mom and Dad